So...Glasgow is currently (till next weekend) hosting the first run of the stage play adaptation of Backbeat, the 1994 movie about erstwhile Beatles bassist Stuart Sutcliffe and the decisions he made in his tragically short life.
Admittedly I've never seen said movie. And I'm kind of glad, because earlier tonight I went to see the play. And I fucking loved it. The characters were believable and well played, and the actors could actually play guitar and sing. They'd done a couple of warm-up gigs in MacSorley's before the play opened - I missed them but heard lots of good things. They did not disappoint, merely added to the performance, and I'm delighted to have seen it.
Ohhh...I wanna see it again...
Photo by Chris Scott
Friday, 26 February 2010
Thursday, 25 February 2010
Eyesight woes
And so, today, I had more problems with contact lenses.
I say 'more' like problems with contact lenses are an ongoing saga for me. They're really not to be honest.
It all started when I was 17, and my previous optician in Shetland told me that my right eye has something called astigmatism. This means that my eye is not shaped properly, and thus will never focus as an eye should (also meaning I can never get laser surgery on it as it wouldn't solve anything). Apparently, though, at the time she told me this also meant I couldn't wear monthly contact lenses - I had to have daily ones. The daily ones were actually pretty uncomfortable to wear, and as a result I wore them very sparingly. I was given thirty days' worth, by the time I'd had them 18 months I'd literally gone through less than half the pairs.
Upon my return to Glasgow for 2nd year in 2007 I got new glasses at a local branch of a certain optician's. I then enquired about getting monthly contacts. I was told my eyes were perfectly healthy, that my old optician in Shetland had been speaking utter crap and yes, I could get monthly ones. So I did. It took ages to get to grips with them but nearly a year or so later I started wearing them pretty much every day.
I don't usually have problems with my lenses, but these last couple of weeks have been different.
I get my lenses and solution in three-monthly batches. My most recent batch came at the beginning of this month. Within a couple of weeks one of the right hand lenses tore in two - while in my eye, which was loads of fun to try and retrieve. I went to the opticians about getting a spare, and got one. Today - when I was having a massively busy day with lots of stuff to finalise for uni - the fresh lens began to hurt too, and I later discovered it had torn in my eye also. It was due to be changed anyway, but still...ouch.
And me needing to make a speech, too...
I say 'more' like problems with contact lenses are an ongoing saga for me. They're really not to be honest.
It all started when I was 17, and my previous optician in Shetland told me that my right eye has something called astigmatism. This means that my eye is not shaped properly, and thus will never focus as an eye should (also meaning I can never get laser surgery on it as it wouldn't solve anything). Apparently, though, at the time she told me this also meant I couldn't wear monthly contact lenses - I had to have daily ones. The daily ones were actually pretty uncomfortable to wear, and as a result I wore them very sparingly. I was given thirty days' worth, by the time I'd had them 18 months I'd literally gone through less than half the pairs.
Upon my return to Glasgow for 2nd year in 2007 I got new glasses at a local branch of a certain optician's. I then enquired about getting monthly contacts. I was told my eyes were perfectly healthy, that my old optician in Shetland had been speaking utter crap and yes, I could get monthly ones. So I did. It took ages to get to grips with them but nearly a year or so later I started wearing them pretty much every day.
I don't usually have problems with my lenses, but these last couple of weeks have been different.
I get my lenses and solution in three-monthly batches. My most recent batch came at the beginning of this month. Within a couple of weeks one of the right hand lenses tore in two - while in my eye, which was loads of fun to try and retrieve. I went to the opticians about getting a spare, and got one. Today - when I was having a massively busy day with lots of stuff to finalise for uni - the fresh lens began to hurt too, and I later discovered it had torn in my eye also. It was due to be changed anyway, but still...ouch.
And me needing to make a speech, too...
Wednesday, 24 February 2010
The Arts - Always Made to Suffer
It saddens me when this happens.
Most recently the art that has suffered - from my perspective anyway - has been music.
I'm loath to say which university I actually attend on the grounds that if they were to find this blog, and I said something they didn't like, they could sue my backside for a hell of a lot of money - which, frankly, I don't have. Anyway - you'll probably clock which one I'm at when I say this.
My uni has two campuses (campii?) - the main one is in the city centre, while a smaller one, housing a separate faculty, exists in the west end. My course is housed on the main campus, but when I was in first year the decision was taken to close the smaller one and just house everyone on the main campus.
Earlier last year, we got a new principal, who, within a mere twelve weeks of taking the job, declared that he wished to turn the university into a 'research-led, technological establishment'. This essentially involved merging faculties and offering staff severance payment or early retirement. We all ended up embarking on several protests against a lot of his plans. The most recently announced one, though, is that of the plan to scrap the BA courses in music and community arts. Both of these are currently housed on the smaller campus, and are considered to be prestigious, both with high employment rates across their fields. We are currently campaigning to save these.
Mirroring this is a recent issue affecting my old home town of Shetland. Basically the local council has just paid off the chief executive to the tune of £250,000. He has been in the job eight months, and in that time he's proven controversial. The trouble is, the council have also just announced that they plan to start charging for music lessons in schools to save money.
Things like this annoy me ¬_¬
Most recently the art that has suffered - from my perspective anyway - has been music.
I'm loath to say which university I actually attend on the grounds that if they were to find this blog, and I said something they didn't like, they could sue my backside for a hell of a lot of money - which, frankly, I don't have. Anyway - you'll probably clock which one I'm at when I say this.
My uni has two campuses (campii?) - the main one is in the city centre, while a smaller one, housing a separate faculty, exists in the west end. My course is housed on the main campus, but when I was in first year the decision was taken to close the smaller one and just house everyone on the main campus.
Earlier last year, we got a new principal, who, within a mere twelve weeks of taking the job, declared that he wished to turn the university into a 'research-led, technological establishment'. This essentially involved merging faculties and offering staff severance payment or early retirement. We all ended up embarking on several protests against a lot of his plans. The most recently announced one, though, is that of the plan to scrap the BA courses in music and community arts. Both of these are currently housed on the smaller campus, and are considered to be prestigious, both with high employment rates across their fields. We are currently campaigning to save these.
Mirroring this is a recent issue affecting my old home town of Shetland. Basically the local council has just paid off the chief executive to the tune of £250,000. He has been in the job eight months, and in that time he's proven controversial. The trouble is, the council have also just announced that they plan to start charging for music lessons in schools to save money.
Things like this annoy me ¬_¬
Monday, 22 February 2010
Life Writing
So, after spending the whole weekend howling at my lack of an idea, I decided the best way to counter it was to write about what I knew. So I've ended up writing a story that is drawn a fair bit from autobiographical experience.
The truth is, there's a lot of it based on incidents that genuinely have happened to me during my lifetime (although they've been exaggerated here and there for dramatic effect). It's kind of my way of exorcising old demons, and it'll need done before long, but is it a good idea? Time shall tell.
The truth is, there's a lot of it based on incidents that genuinely have happened to me during my lifetime (although they've been exaggerated here and there for dramatic effect). It's kind of my way of exorcising old demons, and it'll need done before long, but is it a good idea? Time shall tell.
Saturday, 20 February 2010
My Bucket List
Just now, I've been compiling a bucket list. As in, that list of things I want to do before I die. Don't worry, I'm not going to die any time soon. I just dreamt this up out of boredom.
To begin at the beginning...before I die, I'd like to do the following, in no particular order:
Get published
You saw this one coming! Well, writing's the only thing I've ever been any good at really - or so I see it. As long as I can come up with a good idea and convince someone to publish it I'll be okay. I guess I'll have to be optimistic - or someone will have to be anyway XD
Go back to America
Well...actually, I've already been there. The first time was in 1991, aged 3, when my family and I went to New York to see my mam's pal who lives there. The next was in 2002, aged 14, when we went to Colorado with one of the local music groups. Both fun, but I desperately want to go to California - just cause it's so warm there. Probably not as shiny and romantic as it's made out to be by the media, but it's warm. Or to New York again, maybe Florida. Any of those would be lovely :D
Go back to Japan
I'm pretty sure I mentioned I'd been before, right? Well, that time I went to Towa-cho, a small town in the Iwate province (near the towns of Hanamaki and Morioka). And that was nice (despite my friend Evonne and I seemingly getting racially abused by some random old geezer on the streets of Morioka). But I think next time I go, I should like to go to one of the main cities, i.e. Tokyo or Osaka. I still have the Rough Guide to Japan Mam bought me when I went over there, I'll flick through it and see what else I fancy.
Go back to Australia
Yeah, I've been here too! Just before we - that is, the group of students I was with - went to Japan, we went to Australia (although via Tokyo Narita airport). We started in Brisbane and then went to Sydney, although I have to admit I much preferred the former. I'd happily go back to Brisbane in a heartbeat, if I could afford it. So warm, even in winter.
Visit some more of Europe
Lot of travel plans, huh? Yeah...I've been to a couple of other bits of Europe. I've been to Norway, France, Belgium and Spain (twice). I'd like to see more of it, though. For one thing, I learned German at school but I've never actually been to Germany or any other German-speaking country (I know they're only limited to Europe though). I'd also like to go to Italy, Poland and Sweden, and maybe back to France and Spain again.
Get back into acting
For eight years while I lived in Shetland I was a member of Splinters Youth Theatre, a local drama group. I wasn't actually too bad at acting if I do say so myself. One of the things that attracted me to the university I'm attending was the theatre group there. I joined in first year, then did nothing more with my membership for the whole year, then it expired and I never renewed it. When I graduate I intend to rejoin, or perhaps join another theatre group in the city (there are plenty more!). I had more confidence when I was acting.
Take up an instrument - or several
Actually, I do play stuff. I'm very musical. While at school I played cello, although my old teacher in high school was incredibly unencouraging because I was so useless at sight reading. I play guitar as well, but I've not played in ages because of having other things to do. I should really play instead of mucking around online all the time. I sing too, but again my voice gets little exercise beyond either the shower in the morning or when I'm blaring music off my iTunes library during *cof* study. I'd love to be able to play fiddle or viola, and drums. Maybe piano too. And...what else did I fancy playing? I'd like to play harp. Yeah, that would be epic. On that note, forming a band would be fun too.
See all my favourite bands who are still around live in concert
I think this one's pretty self-explanatory - although I've seen both RHCP (back when Frusciante was still in the fold...ah) and Franz Ferdinand live twice each. I'd love to see the Foos again :)
Get married and have children
Again, shouldn't need to explain this one too much.
Settle in Glasgow
Or this one.
And there we have it.
To begin at the beginning...before I die, I'd like to do the following, in no particular order:
Get published
You saw this one coming! Well, writing's the only thing I've ever been any good at really - or so I see it. As long as I can come up with a good idea and convince someone to publish it I'll be okay. I guess I'll have to be optimistic - or someone will have to be anyway XD
Go back to America
Well...actually, I've already been there. The first time was in 1991, aged 3, when my family and I went to New York to see my mam's pal who lives there. The next was in 2002, aged 14, when we went to Colorado with one of the local music groups. Both fun, but I desperately want to go to California - just cause it's so warm there. Probably not as shiny and romantic as it's made out to be by the media, but it's warm. Or to New York again, maybe Florida. Any of those would be lovely :D
Go back to Japan
I'm pretty sure I mentioned I'd been before, right? Well, that time I went to Towa-cho, a small town in the Iwate province (near the towns of Hanamaki and Morioka). And that was nice (despite my friend Evonne and I seemingly getting racially abused by some random old geezer on the streets of Morioka). But I think next time I go, I should like to go to one of the main cities, i.e. Tokyo or Osaka. I still have the Rough Guide to Japan Mam bought me when I went over there, I'll flick through it and see what else I fancy.
Go back to Australia
Yeah, I've been here too! Just before we - that is, the group of students I was with - went to Japan, we went to Australia (although via Tokyo Narita airport). We started in Brisbane and then went to Sydney, although I have to admit I much preferred the former. I'd happily go back to Brisbane in a heartbeat, if I could afford it. So warm, even in winter.
Visit some more of Europe
Lot of travel plans, huh? Yeah...I've been to a couple of other bits of Europe. I've been to Norway, France, Belgium and Spain (twice). I'd like to see more of it, though. For one thing, I learned German at school but I've never actually been to Germany or any other German-speaking country (I know they're only limited to Europe though). I'd also like to go to Italy, Poland and Sweden, and maybe back to France and Spain again.
Get back into acting
For eight years while I lived in Shetland I was a member of Splinters Youth Theatre, a local drama group. I wasn't actually too bad at acting if I do say so myself. One of the things that attracted me to the university I'm attending was the theatre group there. I joined in first year, then did nothing more with my membership for the whole year, then it expired and I never renewed it. When I graduate I intend to rejoin, or perhaps join another theatre group in the city (there are plenty more!). I had more confidence when I was acting.
Take up an instrument - or several
Actually, I do play stuff. I'm very musical. While at school I played cello, although my old teacher in high school was incredibly unencouraging because I was so useless at sight reading. I play guitar as well, but I've not played in ages because of having other things to do. I should really play instead of mucking around online all the time. I sing too, but again my voice gets little exercise beyond either the shower in the morning or when I'm blaring music off my iTunes library during *cof* study. I'd love to be able to play fiddle or viola, and drums. Maybe piano too. And...what else did I fancy playing? I'd like to play harp. Yeah, that would be epic. On that note, forming a band would be fun too.
See all my favourite bands who are still around live in concert
I think this one's pretty self-explanatory - although I've seen both RHCP (back when Frusciante was still in the fold...ah) and Franz Ferdinand live twice each. I'd love to see the Foos again :)
Get married and have children
Again, shouldn't need to explain this one too much.
Settle in Glasgow
Or this one.
And there we have it.
29 Things About Me
I love these tagging games. Okay, I've not been tagged or anything like that. I just feel like writing it.
1. I was born on 29th April, 1988, at 7:23am in the old maternity annexe of the Gilbert Bain Hospital.
2. The above birth almost happened at the Whiteness and Weisdale Public Hall due to poor planning on the part of my parents. That's another story for another time. All I'll say is that to this day, the two of them still can't get their fucking priorities right.
3. I'm the second of three children. I have an older brother who has been a guitar prodigy since primary school, and a younger sister who is very good at sports.
4. As for me? Well...someday, I'd like to be a published writer. Sadly, one other thing I've become good at is procrastinating.
5. I grew up in Brae, a small settlement in the Delting area of the Shetland mainland. On my mam's side I have roots in Vidlin (also in Delting) and Northmavine, and my dad's crowd all come from Yell, one of the North Isles.
6. I'm the only person in my family that still seems to read books. Thank god for Mam and Lal-Lal, otherwise I'd wonder if I might have the wrong parents...
7. Lal-Lal, you say? Who's that? Well, that would be my paternal granny - I'm the fourth of her five grandchildren. I've become closer to her in recent years, particularly since my maternal granny passed away.
8. Leading on from that...until I moved to Glasgow, my idea of a fun Saturday night was being in Yell at Lal-Lal's playing Scrabble. Although I still don't understand snooker after all these years...
9. I played cello from the age of eight until sixteen. In recent years I've regretted quitting. I also learned guitar - although again, I've been very slack on playing - and I sing.
10. My first pet was a hedgehog we called Tigs (after Mrs Tiggy-Winkle from the Beatrix Potter book). He lived at my Granny Rena's. When we took Tigs to my school to visit both our classes he kept the kids occupied for hours. There is also an unfounded rumour that he crawled up my teacher's trouser leg and fell asleep.
11. I've been a flower girl twice. The first time, when the bridal party went into a garden, I got distracted by a pond full of tadpoles and eventually the photographer took photos of me next to it to keep me sweet. When the photos were developed he put a large version in the window of the shop, and I considered it my proudest achievement.
12. When I was 11, I got both my earlobes pierced, and exactly five years later I got the right side of my nose pierced. No tattoos as yet, dunno if it'll ever happen.
13. My favourite book of childhood is 'Haroun and the Sea of Stories'. My mother bought it for me when I was 12, and I've read it cover-to-cover around four times since.
14. If I could be eighteen again for one weekend, I so would be.
15. From the age of two days old until eighteen and a half, I lived in the same house.
16. This changed when I got accepted to Strathclyde University to do a BA in Arts and Social Sciences. In the time I've lived in Glasgow I've had three different addresses.
17. Following studies, I want to stay in Glasgow when I graduate in July.
18. I didn't get properly drunk for the first time until I was 15 and a half - where I come from, that's considered late.
19. I never learned to cycle a bike.
20. I regret never properly getting the full benefits of my brief membership of Strathclyde Theatre Group. I miss acting, I felt more confident when I did it.
21. The Beatles, Red Hot Chili Peppers and Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers are my Big Three Favourite Bands Ever. After that...you're best off flicking through my iPod.
22. I still listen to CDs when I can.
23. People who can't put CDs and DVDs back in their boxes drive me mental, but it's worse when they leave the disc on top of the box but can't make the effort to put it in. Yes, I actually know people who are this stupid.
24. An adolescence spent working on and off in retail has made me very bitter towards society.
25. I'm terrified of pigeons. And failure. Not in that order.
26. Even just the taste of liquorice makes me gag. I genuinely cannot eat it. Even liquorice flavoured stuff...yuck! >_<
27. My favourite food is spaghetti bolognese - it's one of the only things I can make without a recipe.
28. I'm crap at writing about myself...
29. ...or, at least, making it exciting.
1. I was born on 29th April, 1988, at 7:23am in the old maternity annexe of the Gilbert Bain Hospital.
2. The above birth almost happened at the Whiteness and Weisdale Public Hall due to poor planning on the part of my parents. That's another story for another time. All I'll say is that to this day, the two of them still can't get their fucking priorities right.
3. I'm the second of three children. I have an older brother who has been a guitar prodigy since primary school, and a younger sister who is very good at sports.
4. As for me? Well...someday, I'd like to be a published writer. Sadly, one other thing I've become good at is procrastinating.
5. I grew up in Brae, a small settlement in the Delting area of the Shetland mainland. On my mam's side I have roots in Vidlin (also in Delting) and Northmavine, and my dad's crowd all come from Yell, one of the North Isles.
6. I'm the only person in my family that still seems to read books. Thank god for Mam and Lal-Lal, otherwise I'd wonder if I might have the wrong parents...
7. Lal-Lal, you say? Who's that? Well, that would be my paternal granny - I'm the fourth of her five grandchildren. I've become closer to her in recent years, particularly since my maternal granny passed away.
8. Leading on from that...until I moved to Glasgow, my idea of a fun Saturday night was being in Yell at Lal-Lal's playing Scrabble. Although I still don't understand snooker after all these years...
9. I played cello from the age of eight until sixteen. In recent years I've regretted quitting. I also learned guitar - although again, I've been very slack on playing - and I sing.
10. My first pet was a hedgehog we called Tigs (after Mrs Tiggy-Winkle from the Beatrix Potter book). He lived at my Granny Rena's. When we took Tigs to my school to visit both our classes he kept the kids occupied for hours. There is also an unfounded rumour that he crawled up my teacher's trouser leg and fell asleep.
11. I've been a flower girl twice. The first time, when the bridal party went into a garden, I got distracted by a pond full of tadpoles and eventually the photographer took photos of me next to it to keep me sweet. When the photos were developed he put a large version in the window of the shop, and I considered it my proudest achievement.
12. When I was 11, I got both my earlobes pierced, and exactly five years later I got the right side of my nose pierced. No tattoos as yet, dunno if it'll ever happen.
13. My favourite book of childhood is 'Haroun and the Sea of Stories'. My mother bought it for me when I was 12, and I've read it cover-to-cover around four times since.
14. If I could be eighteen again for one weekend, I so would be.
15. From the age of two days old until eighteen and a half, I lived in the same house.
16. This changed when I got accepted to Strathclyde University to do a BA in Arts and Social Sciences. In the time I've lived in Glasgow I've had three different addresses.
17. Following studies, I want to stay in Glasgow when I graduate in July.
18. I didn't get properly drunk for the first time until I was 15 and a half - where I come from, that's considered late.
19. I never learned to cycle a bike.
20. I regret never properly getting the full benefits of my brief membership of Strathclyde Theatre Group. I miss acting, I felt more confident when I did it.
21. The Beatles, Red Hot Chili Peppers and Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers are my Big Three Favourite Bands Ever. After that...you're best off flicking through my iPod.
22. I still listen to CDs when I can.
23. People who can't put CDs and DVDs back in their boxes drive me mental, but it's worse when they leave the disc on top of the box but can't make the effort to put it in. Yes, I actually know people who are this stupid.
24. An adolescence spent working on and off in retail has made me very bitter towards society.
25. I'm terrified of pigeons. And failure. Not in that order.
26. Even just the taste of liquorice makes me gag. I genuinely cannot eat it. Even liquorice flavoured stuff...yuck! >_<
27. My favourite food is spaghetti bolognese - it's one of the only things I can make without a recipe.
28. I'm crap at writing about myself...
29. ...or, at least, making it exciting.
Wait a minute...!
I think - and I know I shouldn't post even a short blog about this one as I'll totally jinx it - I may have just hatched a new idea.
More information as and when I recieve it.
More information as and when I recieve it.
Friday, 19 February 2010
Good Beatles covers
I am a self-confessed Beatles addict.
It's nothing to be ashamed of. They're my all-time favourite band. This, I guess, is mainly because they've had a huge influence on a lot of the other bands I like. Take a look through my iTunes collection, you'd be pushed to find a band in there that WASN'T influenced by them.
Anyway...as you can probably imagine, I'm a bit picky about Beatles covers. They're a bit of a Marmite situation with me, frankly - I've heard some really pish ones (see Nick Cave's version of 'Here Comes the Sun' and Howie Day's version of 'Help!', both of which turned up on the 'I Am Sam' OST), but there are some sublime ones out there. I've picked three that I particularly like:
This must be the Citizen Kane of Beatles covers. Joe Cocker has an amazing singing voice, and while I will always love the Beatles version, Cocker takes this and makes it his own.
Yet another one I fell in love with on the first hearing. Although the original is a soft one too, Harris really adds something to it. Think it's just nice to hear a Beatles song countryfied. (What? I like country music. Well, some of it!)
And finally:
I love the edgy swagger this version exhudes. Chris Cornell has the perfect voice for this, in my opinion.
There are loads more out there, I know.
It's nothing to be ashamed of. They're my all-time favourite band. This, I guess, is mainly because they've had a huge influence on a lot of the other bands I like. Take a look through my iTunes collection, you'd be pushed to find a band in there that WASN'T influenced by them.
Anyway...as you can probably imagine, I'm a bit picky about Beatles covers. They're a bit of a Marmite situation with me, frankly - I've heard some really pish ones (see Nick Cave's version of 'Here Comes the Sun' and Howie Day's version of 'Help!', both of which turned up on the 'I Am Sam' OST), but there are some sublime ones out there. I've picked three that I particularly like:
This must be the Citizen Kane of Beatles covers. Joe Cocker has an amazing singing voice, and while I will always love the Beatles version, Cocker takes this and makes it his own.
Yet another one I fell in love with on the first hearing. Although the original is a soft one too, Harris really adds something to it. Think it's just nice to hear a Beatles song countryfied. (What? I like country music. Well, some of it!)
And finally:
I love the edgy swagger this version exhudes. Chris Cornell has the perfect voice for this, in my opinion.
There are loads more out there, I know.
Writers' drought
Officially worse than writers' block.
Seriously - I can't actually come up with a new idea after dinghying the one I'd spent all those years on. It's like I've forgotten how. The only new things I've come up with have been flash fiction - usually dreamt up in moments of procrastination. Okay, they're not bad. I've had mostly positive feedback on them. And you know, you can't usually go wrong with flash fiction - as long as you focus you're laughing.
The trouble is, I'm not sure I intend to make a living off short fiction. I more write it for shits and giggles if anything. You never know, if I ever get to be starving hungry I guess I could chuck it in to a publisher to line me pocket...nah, that's greedy. I do have faith in it really. But like I say, it was always novel-writing I intended to make a career out of. Having put aside that idea - although as I said, that animal needed euthanised - I need a new one. I have, of course, been digging through old ideas that ended up in notebooks but never got written down as even a first draft. That, I guess, will have to do. But without a fresh, new, current idea, I seem to be lost. Oh dear, what a depressing thought. :(
What's even more depressing is that it happens to me just before I'm done with uni, when I'm already trying to find a job.
Seriously - I can't actually come up with a new idea after dinghying the one I'd spent all those years on. It's like I've forgotten how. The only new things I've come up with have been flash fiction - usually dreamt up in moments of procrastination. Okay, they're not bad. I've had mostly positive feedback on them. And you know, you can't usually go wrong with flash fiction - as long as you focus you're laughing.
The trouble is, I'm not sure I intend to make a living off short fiction. I more write it for shits and giggles if anything. You never know, if I ever get to be starving hungry I guess I could chuck it in to a publisher to line me pocket...nah, that's greedy. I do have faith in it really. But like I say, it was always novel-writing I intended to make a career out of. Having put aside that idea - although as I said, that animal needed euthanised - I need a new one. I have, of course, been digging through old ideas that ended up in notebooks but never got written down as even a first draft. That, I guess, will have to do. But without a fresh, new, current idea, I seem to be lost. Oh dear, what a depressing thought. :(
What's even more depressing is that it happens to me just before I'm done with uni, when I'm already trying to find a job.
Thursday, 18 February 2010
Getting Through to Paddy
My piece for CW tomorrow
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Even when he was a puppy, I was always scared of Paddy. Always.
Granny and Peter had four pets. The two cats were called Catia and Toffee. Catia was grey with short hair. She was also very grumpy and scratched a lot – she scratched me a few times, although usually I was pulling her tail. She was so gloomy she reminded me of a raincloud. Toffee was white and fluffy with golden-brown patches, and he liked to be stroked, and he didn’t scratch. Catia used to attack him a lot.
The dogs were black and white sheepdogs, and Peter had got them for work, not as pets. Granny and Peter got Paddy as a new puppy when I was three years old. He was the first sheep dog they bought after they married. Even at that size he frightened me. One day, I was sitting in the kitchen at the table, drawing with felt tip pens. My granny was cooking lunch. Paddy’s basket was behind my chair near the big cupboard. While I was drawing he started running under my chair and around my feet, nipping at me. I kept kicking at him.
“Get doon, Paddy,” I said sharply. He didn’t get down.
“Laeve him be,” Granny said.
I didn’t think that was fair. I was trying to leave him be. He was the one who wouldn’t leave me be.
It got worse when he got bigger. When he got to be a certain size he wasn’t allowed in the house any more. Peter didn’t believe in dogs being allowed in the house, even if they were being kept as pets. This didn’t stop Paddy sneaking into the garden sometimes. Granny and Peter also got another sheepdog, Cap. He was already full grown when they got him. Cap was thinner than Paddy, and while Paddy had big black patches over both eyes and most of his nose – like a highwayman’s mask – Cap only had a big black patch over his right eye. He didn’t like me or my brother – indeed any children – and would only listen to Peter.
I didn’t know when I was five that Paddy jumping on me was his way of being friendly. I just knew he was bigger than me, way bigger, and no matter how often Mam, Dad, Granny or Peter tried to reassure me it didn’t help. Usually when Paddy jumped on me he smothered me or knocked me down, or sometimes both which was really horrible. I would scream with terror and would end up needing gathered up in somebody’s arms, usually Mam’s or Granny’s, and calming down took ages. It started to spoil visits to Granny’s. I started to wish harm on Paddy. I used to like sitting in the house with the cats, stroking them both, even though Catia didn’t really like being stroked. When I was in the house, Paddy couldn’t get me. Cap was a different story. He didn’t like me and I didn’t really like him either. We understood each other, and so we just left each other alone. But Paddy didn’t seem to care that I didn’t like him. When I got a bit bigger he wasn’t able to knock me down any more, but then he scratched me a few times, and more often than not, he made me cry. Granny and Peter usually just told me the same thing, he didn’t mean to hurt me and just wanted to be stroked. I would stroke him, and it usually worked, but I still didn’t like how he seemed to win against me all the time.
I spent a lot of time at Granny’s in the summer holidays. One day, when I was nine, I got left there when my mam and dad were at work. My granny sent me out to her greenhouse to get her gardening gloves. The greenhouse was to the left of the house, and to get there I had to walk to the other end of the garden. I wasn’t going to take the long way that involved going out the front gate because Peter had slipped the dogs from their chains, and I wasn’t going to have Paddy jump on me when I was just trying to get to the greenhouse.
I looked out the front door. Paddy’s kennel was empty and he wasn’t anywhere near it. Oh good, I thought – he’s herding sheep with Cap and Peter, he won’t see me. All the same, when I went up the path, instead of going up the steps to the front gate I went left and took the path to the side gate. I stepped through it and closed it, but when I turned around, Paddy was right there in front of me, watching me with those big brown eyes of his – he’d have been cute if he wasn’t so scary. I froze. He was going to jump on me again. Or scratch me, maybe both.
“Go away, Paddy,” I said loudly.
Paddy did the opposite. I felt angry with Mam, Dad, Granny and Peter now. What did they think they were talking about? Of course Paddy meant to do what he was doing. Why else would he do it after being told to stop?
Paddy started sniffing at me. I warned him again. “Go away.”
Then he jumped up.
I dodged him, but he jumped up again. I turned my back to him – Mam told me that works with dogs when they jump up on you. But of course it didn’t work with Paddy. Right, I thought.
He jumped up again.
“Get doon, Paddy,” I shouted, and I suddenly pushed him.
He fell backwards, although he landed on his paws. He looked really shocked. I was a bit shocked too. He looked at me, really hurt, then he stalked off with his tail between his legs.
I watched him go, then went into the greenhouse to get Granny’s gloves. When I came back, she asked me if I was okay. I said I was, and I meant it.
Job Hunt
So...in the flurry I got into about abandoning a work that had consumed nearly seven years of my life, I forgot to mention - my graduation ain't too far off.
The other day, I received the forms and information etc. concerning the aforementioned robes-n'-parchment fest. If all goes well, I graduate on July 12th of this year at 11am. Fun times...provided, of course, that I have a job to fall into.
So here I am, applying for many different things. For one thing, I currently have an election campaign on the go. I've stood for a position in the student executive for a year. Since it's the most contested election this year and I've been very slack on finding a campaign team I've little chance of getting it. I've officially started applying for other jobs too, and will tell these people I can start in May or June depending on exams.
Oh boy...I'll surely find something out of all the stuff I'm looking for. Just sign up to as many job sites as I can. It's not a good time to be a nearly-graduate right now. Better than it was last year, that's for sure, but still not good.
Trouble is, of course, I have no cash behind me. If I can't get a job in Glasgow, or even Edinburgh, I'm screwed. I have to move back home to Shetland, which, to be honest, I don't really want to do any more. There would, of course, be a graduate scheme with the council back home, but that's hardly any kind of guarantee really. Really I'm still keen to work in the media, but that's a bit of a dying industry, and my course has kind of put paid to that idea in so many ways. The class of 2010 will be the first batch of graduates to leave ill-equipped for the real world of work in that sector, all because they made major changes to the course that we didn't ask for...but I can't go into that for various reasons. One of those being that the whole thing still pisses me off.
As well as this...dissertation! See, I told you I wasn't laying my current work to rest completely. This is because the dissertation contains The Good Bits. Well, my supervisor thinks they're good, and I'm more confident in them than I am with the rest of it. Just need to write a commentary that doesn't just say 'It has a beginning, a middle and an end, and a distinctive narrator', and I should be okay. Ah.
The next few months are going to be busy academically. I just hope I can cope with it all without needing sectioned by the end...
The other day, I received the forms and information etc. concerning the aforementioned robes-n'-parchment fest. If all goes well, I graduate on July 12th of this year at 11am. Fun times...provided, of course, that I have a job to fall into.
So here I am, applying for many different things. For one thing, I currently have an election campaign on the go. I've stood for a position in the student executive for a year. Since it's the most contested election this year and I've been very slack on finding a campaign team I've little chance of getting it. I've officially started applying for other jobs too, and will tell these people I can start in May or June depending on exams.
Oh boy...I'll surely find something out of all the stuff I'm looking for. Just sign up to as many job sites as I can. It's not a good time to be a nearly-graduate right now. Better than it was last year, that's for sure, but still not good.
Trouble is, of course, I have no cash behind me. If I can't get a job in Glasgow, or even Edinburgh, I'm screwed. I have to move back home to Shetland, which, to be honest, I don't really want to do any more. There would, of course, be a graduate scheme with the council back home, but that's hardly any kind of guarantee really. Really I'm still keen to work in the media, but that's a bit of a dying industry, and my course has kind of put paid to that idea in so many ways. The class of 2010 will be the first batch of graduates to leave ill-equipped for the real world of work in that sector, all because they made major changes to the course that we didn't ask for...but I can't go into that for various reasons. One of those being that the whole thing still pisses me off.
As well as this...dissertation! See, I told you I wasn't laying my current work to rest completely. This is because the dissertation contains The Good Bits. Well, my supervisor thinks they're good, and I'm more confident in them than I am with the rest of it. Just need to write a commentary that doesn't just say 'It has a beginning, a middle and an end, and a distinctive narrator', and I should be okay. Ah.
The next few months are going to be busy academically. I just hope I can cope with it all without needing sectioned by the end...
Wednesday, 17 February 2010
Time on me is wasted time
And so, after some deliberation, I have decided to put my main novel on the back burner until I can think of a vastly-improved idea for it.
Basically I'd started draft one aged fifteen, back when I was a tortured high school nothing who had few friends and kept myself to myself a lot. I dug out my mam's old typewriter - an old battered teal-coloured Olivetti - and began it on an August afternoon. It was always a bit Dystopian, but I kept restarting it, convinced it was some kind of Magnum Opus I was writing.
Gradually, over the years I've been making changes to it. In some ways it made progress, but in many others I spent six years on it, just bumbling along and making the same mistakes over and over again. More often than not I got fed up with it. But I kept telling myself that it would be a waste to give up on it after all this time. The trouble was, it seemed to eat up all my thinking capacity. It eclipsed everything else I conceived during this time space, which was a shame because in this time I've had a couple of really good ideas. A lot of them have ended up consigned to notebooks, to be worked on when I get time. But I never will, will I?
Anyway - earlier today I had a discussion with a certain person I'm close to. I won't explicitly mention his name or how I'm close to him - I guess the best way to refer to him is as a form of sensei. (Yes, I'm slightly obsessed with Japan and its culture.) I'd restarted the third draft of the novel for the third time. I gave him the first chapter to read, and although he gave me some good advice on improving it he hinted beforehand that he felt I'd improved as a writer since beginning this and that there were still elements in it of who I was when I was younger. I don't know if he realised this, but he had essentially gleaned from reading it how I've been feeling about it - which is that I've lost heart with it and my refusal to give up on it was an attempt at convincing myself that I'd get there eventually. Using a part of it as my dissertation was an attempt to curb this which fell flat on its face. I guess a lot of what was going on when I began it has since been buried in the past and I've moved on. A number of writers describe their work as their 'babies'. And I guess, in many ways, this novel is my baby. The trouble is, you're supposed to raise a baby and take care of it, nurture it and make sure it develops properly. My 'baby' wasn't doing this. If anything - pardon the morbid image I'm about to use - it was on a life support machine and I was simply refusing to turn off the switch.
I want to be quite clear - I am not completely and utterly pieing this idea. That really would be a waste of seven years. For one thing, a portion of it is still being used for my dissertation, and it's actually one of the better portions. It is instead on the back burner, which is a different thing entirely. It means that I still love these characters and want to do something with them still. But for now, I will merely write down scenes I can think up for them as they go, and see if I can get a better idea out of that. Making that decision earlier was emotional, to say the least, but it needed to be done. And I'd rather have heard such a verdict from someone I trust - at least he let me down gently, certainly more so than some would have.
And don't worry, I'm still creating. I've got a couple of plans that are complete or at least not far off it. Some I even started writing and am a good bit of the way through. I'm not completely at a loss. If anything, I think I feel a bit better for what I'm doing....
Basically I'd started draft one aged fifteen, back when I was a tortured high school nothing who had few friends and kept myself to myself a lot. I dug out my mam's old typewriter - an old battered teal-coloured Olivetti - and began it on an August afternoon. It was always a bit Dystopian, but I kept restarting it, convinced it was some kind of Magnum Opus I was writing.
Gradually, over the years I've been making changes to it. In some ways it made progress, but in many others I spent six years on it, just bumbling along and making the same mistakes over and over again. More often than not I got fed up with it. But I kept telling myself that it would be a waste to give up on it after all this time. The trouble was, it seemed to eat up all my thinking capacity. It eclipsed everything else I conceived during this time space, which was a shame because in this time I've had a couple of really good ideas. A lot of them have ended up consigned to notebooks, to be worked on when I get time. But I never will, will I?
Anyway - earlier today I had a discussion with a certain person I'm close to. I won't explicitly mention his name or how I'm close to him - I guess the best way to refer to him is as a form of sensei. (Yes, I'm slightly obsessed with Japan and its culture.) I'd restarted the third draft of the novel for the third time. I gave him the first chapter to read, and although he gave me some good advice on improving it he hinted beforehand that he felt I'd improved as a writer since beginning this and that there were still elements in it of who I was when I was younger. I don't know if he realised this, but he had essentially gleaned from reading it how I've been feeling about it - which is that I've lost heart with it and my refusal to give up on it was an attempt at convincing myself that I'd get there eventually. Using a part of it as my dissertation was an attempt to curb this which fell flat on its face. I guess a lot of what was going on when I began it has since been buried in the past and I've moved on. A number of writers describe their work as their 'babies'. And I guess, in many ways, this novel is my baby. The trouble is, you're supposed to raise a baby and take care of it, nurture it and make sure it develops properly. My 'baby' wasn't doing this. If anything - pardon the morbid image I'm about to use - it was on a life support machine and I was simply refusing to turn off the switch.
I want to be quite clear - I am not completely and utterly pieing this idea. That really would be a waste of seven years. For one thing, a portion of it is still being used for my dissertation, and it's actually one of the better portions. It is instead on the back burner, which is a different thing entirely. It means that I still love these characters and want to do something with them still. But for now, I will merely write down scenes I can think up for them as they go, and see if I can get a better idea out of that. Making that decision earlier was emotional, to say the least, but it needed to be done. And I'd rather have heard such a verdict from someone I trust - at least he let me down gently, certainly more so than some would have.
And don't worry, I'm still creating. I've got a couple of plans that are complete or at least not far off it. Some I even started writing and am a good bit of the way through. I'm not completely at a loss. If anything, I think I feel a bit better for what I'm doing....
Monday, 15 February 2010
Music and Life - Alan Watts
My brother turned me on to this video some time ago. I think it's an absolutely perfect analogy about life, and one that we should all try and follow:
Sunday, 14 February 2010
What I'm Watching
Right, so - you may or may not be surprised to discover this, but I'm not a great watcher of telly.
Sure, Ashley and I pay our TV licence. Monthly. But we rarely, if ever - or I do, anyway - watch telly as it's broadcast. I tend to watch online - all I can say is, thank god for the BBC iPlayer. And indeed all those other catch up services. Oh, and BBC's live feed, because when I do want to watch telly live, my piece of shit Freeview box always spoils the fun ¬_¬
Anyway, sorry...yeah, I'm gonna pick what I've been watching lately.
Being Human
I love this show. For those of you who don't watch it, it's about Mitchell, George and Annie, three twentysomethings who live together in Bristol. This doesn't sound unusual? Well, Mitchell is a vampire, George is a werewolf and Annie is a ghost. The series follows the three as they try to integrate into society, all the while trying to keep their conditions under control.
Episode 6 (out of 8) of Series 2 has just been broadcast. Series 1 is available on Surf the Channel for those of you who haven't been lucky enough to catch it during its initial broadcast. Series 2 is currently being aired but all previous episodes are on the iPlayer. Go watch - you don't need to be a fan of the supernatural to enjoy it, it's a genuinely gripping piece of telly.
Desperate Housewives
I guess I cite this one as a guilty pleasure. I only started watching it half way through season three, back when I lived in my halls in first year (god, I can't believe how long ago that was now...). I actually still need to watch the first two and a half seasons, and I'm pretty sure I missed out a couple of episodes of season four as well. But yeah, basically I'm addicted to it now and I'm always excited to see what's happening next. I know the UK has only just seen episode 3, but I've been checking it out on Surf the Channel. This season's pretty amazing so far, I must say...
Glee
Yet another guilty pleasure of mine. I remember hearing the premise, and the version of 'Don't Stop Believing', and thinking, "Oh Jesus, yet another High School Musical rip-off, shoot me now." (Yes, I hate High School Musical, what of it?) But I watched the first episode and actually really enjoyed myself. It helps that the characters are a bit more likeable than in HSM (although that's not hard in my opinion) but there are also some genuinely witty one-liners in it ("How's that homelessness thing working out for ya? Try not being homeless.") and it also focuses on things that are genuine teenage issues.
And, lastly...
Limmy's Show
Yeah...been watching this too. Not as good as his web stuff, but still some great sketches all the same.
There you go, children, a telly blog. These shall be rare occurrences.
Sure, Ashley and I pay our TV licence. Monthly. But we rarely, if ever - or I do, anyway - watch telly as it's broadcast. I tend to watch online - all I can say is, thank god for the BBC iPlayer. And indeed all those other catch up services. Oh, and BBC's live feed, because when I do want to watch telly live, my piece of shit Freeview box always spoils the fun ¬_¬
Anyway, sorry...yeah, I'm gonna pick what I've been watching lately.
Being Human
I love this show. For those of you who don't watch it, it's about Mitchell, George and Annie, three twentysomethings who live together in Bristol. This doesn't sound unusual? Well, Mitchell is a vampire, George is a werewolf and Annie is a ghost. The series follows the three as they try to integrate into society, all the while trying to keep their conditions under control.
Episode 6 (out of 8) of Series 2 has just been broadcast. Series 1 is available on Surf the Channel for those of you who haven't been lucky enough to catch it during its initial broadcast. Series 2 is currently being aired but all previous episodes are on the iPlayer. Go watch - you don't need to be a fan of the supernatural to enjoy it, it's a genuinely gripping piece of telly.
Desperate Housewives
I guess I cite this one as a guilty pleasure. I only started watching it half way through season three, back when I lived in my halls in first year (god, I can't believe how long ago that was now...). I actually still need to watch the first two and a half seasons, and I'm pretty sure I missed out a couple of episodes of season four as well. But yeah, basically I'm addicted to it now and I'm always excited to see what's happening next. I know the UK has only just seen episode 3, but I've been checking it out on Surf the Channel. This season's pretty amazing so far, I must say...
Glee
Yet another guilty pleasure of mine. I remember hearing the premise, and the version of 'Don't Stop Believing', and thinking, "Oh Jesus, yet another High School Musical rip-off, shoot me now." (Yes, I hate High School Musical, what of it?) But I watched the first episode and actually really enjoyed myself. It helps that the characters are a bit more likeable than in HSM (although that's not hard in my opinion) but there are also some genuinely witty one-liners in it ("How's that homelessness thing working out for ya? Try not being homeless.") and it also focuses on things that are genuine teenage issues.
And, lastly...
Limmy's Show
Yeah...been watching this too. Not as good as his web stuff, but still some great sketches all the same.
There you go, children, a telly blog. These shall be rare occurrences.
Valentine's
Hello again :)
So...last night, I attended my third Club Noir, and my first masked ball.
For those of you who don't know what Club Noir is, it's the biggest burlesque club in the world. It's held four or five times a year, usually at the O2 Academy Glasgow (although it has been to the Edinburgh Fringe festival and the Connect Festival too). It's usually featured in noted publications such as The List Magazine and it usually sells well - indeed this event sold out about a week prior, although this doesn't beat the Halloween 2009 event's record of 17 days.
Anyway...upon discovering shortly before Christmas that their Valentine's event was going to be a Venetian masked ball, I got stupidly excited. I badgered my friend Ashley - who is also my flat mate - to get the tickets (I'd bought the Halloween ones when we went to that). Organisation-wise it kind of went to pot. It was initially going to be me, her, her boyfriend and our friend Meredith, who I met on a school trip to Japan / Australia four and a half years ago when we still lived in Shetland (no, I didn't go to private school, honest). Meredith was also hoping to entice her boyfriend to come, but eventually a few weeks back she had to message me over Facebook saying she couldn't make it. So it would just be the three of us.
So yesterday, Ashley got an emergency phone call from her mam, and had to go back home. Out of respect for her and her family, I'm not gonna go into detail, but she ended up texting to say they couldn't make it either. So inevitably I panicked, wondering what to do about these two spare tickets I now had on my hands and thinking months of planning would have to go to pot. The first thing I did was to text around my friends asking frantically if they wanted to take these tickets off my hands. Help came in the form of my good friends Sian and Eilidh, who decided they'd come with me, having nothing better to do. Sigh of relief was breathed, and I cooked my tea (chicken katsu curry, courtesy of the YO! Sushi cookbook. Didn't look so good but tasted great), threw on my outfit and bobbed along on my merry way to meet them at Central Station, before getting the subway to where the O2 Academy is.
We had a great time. The bill for this event was the best one I've seen definitely. Having the guys from Scottish Opera singing at it was inspired. The only disappointment was the lack of a number from Lou Hickey, because she really is a lovely singer. Apart from that, top notch.
I'm on the right. My mask was from Mask Heaven, who I found by randomly Googling them - nice one, eh? My dress and bolero are from Vivien of Holloway. I saw no less than four other people wearing dresses from the same shop. It's also the reason for the name of this blog - Blue Dress Press. Geddit? My jewellery was courtesy of RockLove Jewellery, who I'll say more about another time. And to my left is the lovely Sian.
This here is Eilidh, on the right with orange hair.
A good night was had in all, and I can't wait for the next one - hopefully I'll still be living in Glasgow when it comes around!
So...last night, I attended my third Club Noir, and my first masked ball.
For those of you who don't know what Club Noir is, it's the biggest burlesque club in the world. It's held four or five times a year, usually at the O2 Academy Glasgow (although it has been to the Edinburgh Fringe festival and the Connect Festival too). It's usually featured in noted publications such as The List Magazine and it usually sells well - indeed this event sold out about a week prior, although this doesn't beat the Halloween 2009 event's record of 17 days.
Anyway...upon discovering shortly before Christmas that their Valentine's event was going to be a Venetian masked ball, I got stupidly excited. I badgered my friend Ashley - who is also my flat mate - to get the tickets (I'd bought the Halloween ones when we went to that). Organisation-wise it kind of went to pot. It was initially going to be me, her, her boyfriend and our friend Meredith, who I met on a school trip to Japan / Australia four and a half years ago when we still lived in Shetland (no, I didn't go to private school, honest). Meredith was also hoping to entice her boyfriend to come, but eventually a few weeks back she had to message me over Facebook saying she couldn't make it. So it would just be the three of us.
So yesterday, Ashley got an emergency phone call from her mam, and had to go back home. Out of respect for her and her family, I'm not gonna go into detail, but she ended up texting to say they couldn't make it either. So inevitably I panicked, wondering what to do about these two spare tickets I now had on my hands and thinking months of planning would have to go to pot. The first thing I did was to text around my friends asking frantically if they wanted to take these tickets off my hands. Help came in the form of my good friends Sian and Eilidh, who decided they'd come with me, having nothing better to do. Sigh of relief was breathed, and I cooked my tea (chicken katsu curry, courtesy of the YO! Sushi cookbook. Didn't look so good but tasted great), threw on my outfit and bobbed along on my merry way to meet them at Central Station, before getting the subway to where the O2 Academy is.
We had a great time. The bill for this event was the best one I've seen definitely. Having the guys from Scottish Opera singing at it was inspired. The only disappointment was the lack of a number from Lou Hickey, because she really is a lovely singer. Apart from that, top notch.
I'm on the right. My mask was from Mask Heaven, who I found by randomly Googling them - nice one, eh? My dress and bolero are from Vivien of Holloway. I saw no less than four other people wearing dresses from the same shop. It's also the reason for the name of this blog - Blue Dress Press. Geddit? My jewellery was courtesy of RockLove Jewellery, who I'll say more about another time. And to my left is the lovely Sian.
This here is Eilidh, on the right with orange hair.
A good night was had in all, and I can't wait for the next one - hopefully I'll still be living in Glasgow when it comes around!
Friday, 12 February 2010
Salutations!
So - I have arrived on Blogspot! *waves*
This is the third blog I've ever had. I decided to give up on my Myspace one (unless I wish to write something extremely private) because let's face it, we're all on Facebook or Twitter these days. I've decided to grow up a bit and get a new one.
Anyway - my name's Hannah, I'm 21 and I'm nearly done with uni. This is, I guess, the catalyst for this blog - being that I will be a graduate in about six months time, I decided it was time to start over.
I don't really know what I want to do with my life. What I really want is to be a writer. I have around three or four novels in the pipeline, only two of which are being written. One has consumed me a great deal over the years. It's probably not my best work, but I've been focussing on it for around six years now, I can't give up with it quite yet.
Oh boy, I'm so shit at writing about myself. I'll come back to this later.
This is the third blog I've ever had. I decided to give up on my Myspace one (unless I wish to write something extremely private) because let's face it, we're all on Facebook or Twitter these days. I've decided to grow up a bit and get a new one.
Anyway - my name's Hannah, I'm 21 and I'm nearly done with uni. This is, I guess, the catalyst for this blog - being that I will be a graduate in about six months time, I decided it was time to start over.
I don't really know what I want to do with my life. What I really want is to be a writer. I have around three or four novels in the pipeline, only two of which are being written. One has consumed me a great deal over the years. It's probably not my best work, but I've been focussing on it for around six years now, I can't give up with it quite yet.
Oh boy, I'm so shit at writing about myself. I'll come back to this later.
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